Thursday, February 11, 2010

stay

just one word might do the trick. how far would you go?

it's not all my choice. decisions aren't always one sided, and minds can be swayed. if it's worth it, if you want it. but so far all i've seen are that maybe things are best to be left like this.

it's not what you can't say; it's about what you can. and what you're choosing not to do are the very things that are keeping me away.

x
we're,
running out of time.

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Monday, February 8, 2010

question.

how do you mend the holes after each and every letdown?

perfect tion.



(credits: fuckyeahskinnybitch)

oh what i wouldn't give to add "Size Zero, Beautiful and Absolute Perfection" to my 'About me' in this thing they call Life.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

New.

"perhaps yearning is something, but holding all that you wish for is another."

fever is back! slightly. headaches all round and temperature is up! sucks to be me right now.

went out with Cynthia yesterday to town. Did our CNY shopping, and i'm well pleased with the things I've gotten. Shopped at Far East, and headed to town for our dinner. was starving like mad at the end of the day.

A then texted me and asked if we wanted to head to Shanghai Dolly, so off we went. it was his ship's anniversary, blabla and apparently a lot of people were there cause he introduced me to quite a number of people.

that night was quite ironic. sarcastic laugh*

it was quite fun though, considering the fact that i haven't been out for so long! the dj's weren't too bad either, save for the winding down sound effect thingy that they did one too many times. but all things considered, that place wasn't bad at all.

i think people are more friendly once alcohol loosened them up. met a lady in the toilet and we chatted a bit blabla, and we saw her on the stage too! plus her table wasn't far off from ours.

left fucking early, around 2 am-ish. wanted to stay for the whole night, but A has become an old man and needs his rest.

wasn't too happy with that, but i guess he knows that i can hold my own now, though.

went to A's after, and Cyn and i spent the whole night talking, and she taught me a way to fortune tell with the usage of cards that she learnt from Angie. hahaha like so cool only! shall try it out on my sisters asap.

talked on the phone with A just now. told him some stuff that i've been unhappy about, and he told me some stuff that made me cry. am on a pms-y kick i think, and he was quite patient with me, though he thinks that i've been acting really weird the whole time.

i'm the kind of person who notices every little action anyone does, and they're put into consideration, no matter how insignificant it is. i think i'm really starting to appreciate how he's trying to change, and how he really wants the best for me no matter what our status is. in some ways he's like my best friend, but in some ways i know he's not.

relationships are confusing and contradicting. at times i'd want nothing more than for him to leave me alone and go away, but at other times i'll just want him to be by my side, feeling like i need his attention and his love more than anything else to make me feel better.

i guess it's trying to sort out the pieces and piecing them together that makes this whole process worthwhile?

damn photos won't load. oh well too bad. photos up some other day then, whoever's reading.

i'm keeping to my 2010 resolutions! or something like that. :/


xoxo
and tomorrow's another day.

Wednesday, February 3, 2010

valentine




look at my retarded kiddy. he's trying to show that he's fit and that he has big muscles. hehe i miss you sucker! and.....see you tomorrow! <3

ps: hope you like this picture.


xoxo

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

heartbeat

kinda gave up on changing my template. >:/ accidentally pressed the whole thing and wham! the whole thing was gone. okay luh. not really wham! but still.....

i think i've become fatter! it shows on my face, like whenever i've gained more weight, my face instantly gets pudgier. sad face*

i want a new digital camera! i just realized that even my mum's one is lousy. though it's pink and all..... plus my bb's phone totally CMI. i love pictures which are like..... so clear. but then again, clear pictures = revealing of my bad skin = not good. gah!

just watched 'The Curious Case of Benjamin Button' (i know i'm slow. put off watching cause it was so damn long), and it's so sad! my heart had that..... achey feeling. and i cried and cried and cried and cried. okay i'm a sucker when it comes to such movies. but not sad meh?!?!?!?!

okay no photos in this post. realized that i look damn fat in all of them. time to STOP EATING! hahahaha it's all a state of mindddddd.....

kay thx bye!


xx