stay close, don't go.

"won't you take my hand/ can i have this dance"

work tomorrow, busy busy busy. shall update with photos.

and i'm so close to snapping, too, too close.

alright photos :

again, not all of them since i'm really bored of editing photos, and have resorted to blindly editing them resulting in some becoming quite horrible.

this was when Mingkang, Roy, Wendy, Mabel and John came to somewhere near my house and i went down to meet them, and we ended up eating super cheap but yummy durians. hehe and they came up for some hold em and i lost 20 bucks. LOL



interview that day with Bec at Clarke Quay with a weirdo boss and weirdo 'team mates' but the pay is good, so..... shrugs *




and she doesn't like to take photos with me!



Sakura, finally with the usuals. And they hold em'ed in the MRT. like totally anywhere, anytime yo! HAHA



$30 bucks for sashimi and some weird weird stuff. seems nice though i didn't eat much that day ><





a place at Clarke Quay sells these kinda sweets and they're totally cute, like having 'KISS ME' on the candies. yeah old news but stilllll!!!!!









and i think Hongguo learns this in school. LOLLOL.





celebrated Huibing's birthday yesterday at her place with Karen, Baochuan, Andy and Yutong. Esther and Hb's boyfriend joined us awhile later! photos will be up soon enough. (:

then we sent Bc off and K and i walked around and finally settled our asses below Hougang Plaza for some chat chit chit chat. missed them all a lot a lot, and it was very very nice seeing them all again. hehe.

went with K to some kopitiam near Pungol Park, and saw some of the other guys. left a few minutes later and cabbed to Justin's for mahjong, but dropped Glenn at Kovan since he was headed there too.

enjoyed myself at the Bitch's, but yeah unhappy things happened again, with ______ .

i guess i'm always doing wrong things, saying the wrong things, ecetera. i'm way far from perfect, be it exterior-wise, or who i am inside. i don't really think before i do anything, and i always let my emotions take me.

but i'm learning, i really am. slowly, to let go, slowly to treat it as if it doesn't matter. slowly, slowly. after all, all these takes time, no?

i'm not saying that i've let go of him, or given up hope on us, but i do have to let him go a little, in order to be happier. cause i'm always expecting too much, and being over obsessed when we're fighting, which is most of the time.

but yes, i'm very very very very very happy when we're on our good days.

and today (or rather yesterday), i finally snapped a little. guess the rubber in me frayed just a little, and i said something. i felt more alive after it, like. 'YAY! Johanna Teo you're finally being like how you were!' i miss my old self. that part of nochalance, that part of being not bothered.

and well, today's the sixth month. supposedly it is. and my heart feels kind of heavy and sour thinking of how happy we can be now. but yeah, it's something i have to learn.

and learn i shall.

on another note, i just got back from Rivervale Plaza with Bec. she came over to take her stuff, and i kept asking her to keep me company there and back. say YAYYYYY for one of your besties to be staying around you. heheee. oh ya MacSpicy is damn addicting yummmmmmmszxzxzx.!

and on the note of besties, joey liowry HAPPY EIGHTEENTH! i love you mucho mucho mucho to the extremes. i do, i do. and, we're screwed, but we can't stop life from happening. if you get my drift.

<33333

and as the song goes,

i know i've been selfish,
i know i've been foolish,
but look through that,
and you will see,

i'll do better, i know,
baby i can do better,

if you leave me tonight,
i'll wake up on my own,
don't tell me i can make it on my own,
this heart of stone will sing till it dies,
if you leave me tonight.


xoxo
especially you,
in mine.

ps: i won't hope you'll be back, won't want you to, if only not to let my heart get broken again. not having any expectations make the fall gentler, if it comes. but baby, that doesn't stop me wanting you to be by my side. and i hope you meant the part that it's mutual, cause you make me happier than anything in the world, and you've made yourself a permanent residence in my heart.